Back to School with Inclusion in Mind: A Reflection on Disability, Belonging, and the Role of Parents
As summer winds down and the back-to-school routines begin; new backpacks, sharpened pencils, and first-day nerves it’s easy to focus only on the logistics. But for families of children with disabilities, this season carries a different weight. It’s not just about school supplies and schedules.
It’s about belonging.
Sending Bennett to school each fall is an act of trust. Trust in the educators, in the environment, and—perhaps most powerfully—in the hearts of his peers. Because the truth is, disability is not something that should exclude a child from the rhythms of the classroom or the magic of friendship. But whether that happens often comes down to how we as adults talk about, model, and guide inclusion.
Inclusion Starts at Home
Children are naturally curious, kind, and accepting. They don’t instinctively label differences as “bad” or “wrong”—they learn that from us. When we tiptoe around disability or avoid talking about children who use wheelchairs, AAC devices, or need extra help, we send the message that these things are uncomfortable or even shameful.
It is our job as parents to break that pattern. We have the power to shape how our children see others—and that starts with the language we use, the questions we answer honestly, and the way we welcome all kinds of bodies and minds into conversation.
Say “Disability” Proudly
One of the most powerful things we can do is stop whispering the word “disability.” Disability isn’t a bad word, it’s a facet of human diversity. Avoiding the word doesn’t make it go away; it just makes it harder for disabled kids to be seen clearly and proudly.
Instead of saying, “He’s differently abled” or “She has special needs,” try:
“He’s disabled and uses a wheelchair to get around.”
“She’s autistic and sometimes needs quiet space.”
Using clear, respectful language helps children understand disability without fear or shame. It also helps normalize disability as part of the world, not something set apart from it.
Kids Can Lead the Way
One of the most beautiful things I’ve witnessed is how openly Bennett’s classmates embrace him. They push his adaptive stroller without being asked. They wait for him to catch up. They include him in birthday parties, recess games, and group projects, not because an adult told them to, but because they want to.
And I want you to understand what that means to a parent like me.
I can’t ask Bennett how his day was. I can’t get the after-school rundown or know for sure if he felt included at recess or had someone to sit with at lunch. So when I see his classmates reach for him with kindness and joy, when they smile at him across the hallway or wave when we’re out at the grocery store, believe me, it matters. It makes a huge difference in my comfort level sending him to school each day.
What I see in Bennett’s classroom is not just friendship, it’s humanity at its purest. These children aren’t diminished by his differences; they are expanded by them. They are learning patience, empathy, leadership, and joy. And it shows me that inclusion doesn’t dilute a community; it strengthens it.
Tips for Teaching Inclusion at Home
Whether or not your child has a disabled classmate, you can begin teaching inclusion now:
Talk about disability openly. If your child has questions about someone’s mobility device or speech pattern, answer them with honesty and respect.
Model inclusive language. Use “disabled” instead of euphemisms, and talk about accessibility and support in empowering ways.
Expose your child to diverse stories. Choose books and shows with disabled characters who are fully developed—not just “inspirational.”
Encourage friendships that cross differences. Invite all classmates to birthday parties, playdates, and events—even if you think it may require some extra planning.
Challenge ableism when you see it. If someone makes an exclusionary comment or assumption, let your child see you speak up.
The School Year Ahead
As we send our children back into classrooms this fall, let’s remember: Inclusion doesn’t happen by accident. It happens because adults make intentional choices to nurture it. It happens when we believe in every child’s right to belong, and when we empower our own kids to be the kind of friends who see worth in everyone.
Bennett is not just accepted in his school, he’s valued. He brings out the best in the children around him. And if we keep showing up, speaking truthfully, and expecting more from our systems and ourselves, then we can raise a generation of kids who know that inclusion isn’t extra. It’s essential.
Let’s make this school year one where every child sees themselves reflected, respected, and welcomed exactly as they are.